HERE IS THE NEWS AT MIDNIGHT

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President George Bush has attacked five Iraqi tourists
with a knife. A spokesman for the White House said
"Better that, than
World War Three".

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A motorist has set fire to himself in protest
at rising petrol prices. The leader of the Opposition has
hailed him as a martyr and called on the Government
to cause more oil to be created in the bowels
of the earth.

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After a decade of study, a respected think tank
has published a twenty volume report showing that
the arms industry does more harm than good.
A banker has condemned the report as factually correct
but naïve.

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Scientists at Porton Down have discovered that
the Foot and Mouth Disease virus can be modified
to attack humans. A top scientific expert said
"We are looking for ways to cure the
common crowd."

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~Richard Lawson

They say that nobody's badr

Than Moqtada al Sadr

But when shove comes to push

He's no worse than Bush

~Richard Lawson

A FAIRGROUND RIDE

two kids inside a car
fight
for the right
to spin a useless steering wheel

politics

~Richard Lawson